This. Sentence. Is. False.

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I am a very private person, yet I am an open book.
If you don’t ask…I won’t tell.

- (via violet-priincess)

(Source: iamboundtowin)

broadway-aradia:

i really want to carry a torch in a cave just like one time

(Source: seven-lilies)

yungterra:

inturlrude:

yungterra:

naked body fresh out the shower

you touch yourself afterhours

why do you have this dirty ass skeleton

he’s obviously not dirty he just took a fuckin shower got dam

gaystray:

do you ever just smell an old perfume, or hear an old song, or pass an old hangout spot and kinda break inside for a couple minutes

boxedjellyfish:

I wish my whole vocab was as great as this line

boxedjellyfish:

I wish my whole vocab was as great as this line

i-heart-hawkguy:

dorkly:

The Sims Career Ladder

I laughed so hard I nearly peed

alluringhubris:

Legend of hoW MUCH SHIT CAN WE PUT THE AVATAR THROUGH IN 22 MINUTES

slayboybunny:

date someone who makes you feel like Everytime We Touch by Cascada on the inside 

whiskeydrinking-operating:

This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said 
“Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad)
I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.

You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.

whiskeydrinking-operating:

This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said
“Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad)
I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.

You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.

jazzman8675309:

jazzman8675309:

prince-of-insanity:

psychoteentitan:

The US version of Harry Potter is surprisingly short. 

I’ve been laughing at this for like half an hour cause when Harry fires the gun it looks like he’s saying “BAM!”

Bam! Omg I’m dying

Someone reblogged this from me after I forgot about it and then I laughed for ten minutes and actually LEFT MY BED TO SHOW MY FAMILY

jazzman8675309:

jazzman8675309:

prince-of-insanity:

psychoteentitan:

The US version of Harry Potter is surprisingly short. 

I’ve been laughing at this for like half an hour cause when Harry fires the gun it looks like he’s saying “BAM!”

Bam! Omg I’m dying

Someone reblogged this from me after I forgot about it and then I laughed for ten minutes and actually LEFT MY BED TO SHOW MY FAMILY

faptop:

WHY AM I LAUGHING SO HARD WHY IS MY SENSE OF HUMOR THIS TERRIBLE

(Source: mountainmoonvolcano)

(Source: parks-and-recreation-department)

yourvoiceinnovember:

college bookstores

yourvoiceinnovember:

college bookstores

(Source: funniestpicturesdaily)